Newborn baby clothes often have to be changed more times than Beyonce concert costumes by people existing on two hours’ sleep. They should be easy. But they’re not. So to simplify matters, here are ten things you need to know. Including what sizes to buy for a newborn, whether they need to be pre-washed and the surprising reason why the neck is so wide on bodysuits.

1. The sizing is very confusing

Why is there a ‘newborn’ size AND ‘0-3 months’? Doesn’t that zero also mean newborn? You can sometimes find a weight and size guide, but before the birth, you’re unlikely to know exactly how big your newborn will be. It doesn’t help that clothing companies haven’t reached a consensus on what actually is a ‘newborn’ or ‘0-3 months’ size. It’s all enough to bring on premature labour. (And what size do you need THEN? Early? Tiny? First size?)

Here are the sizes you are most likely to see on baby clothes’ labels.

Premature – For babies that come before 37 weeks. They are very small. We’re talking 3-4lb. Around 7% of births are premature. So the chances are you won’t need this size. If you do, send someone out to get a few essential bits in this size.

Early – This is for babies born between 37 weeks and full term. They are likely to be around 5lb. Once again, you can’t predict this. It might be useful to have one Babygro and bodysuit in this size, just in case.

Tiny – A baby born full term but smaller than average.

Newborn – An average-sized newborn. Also called ‘first size’ and ‘0 months’.

0-3 months – For very big babies. Realistically this size won’t fit most babies until 1-2 months.

But what do some of the major baby clothes companies mean when they say tiny or newborn? What size will they actually fit?

Baby clothes size chart

They really need to talk to each other and come to some kind of agreement. Once I’ve got a bit of spare time, I’ll try and broker these talks.

How many of each size should I buy? How long will they fit?

This can be hard to judge. You don't want to be popping out to the shops with a two-day-old baby because you’ve run out of clean Babygros. But, as you've probably noticed, babies do tend to grow quite a lot.

The best advice is to get a few cheap Babygros and bodysuits in small sizes. Then more in the 0-3 months, which will be worn for longer. If you run out, you can rely on online deliveries or family and friends to get you more. And if you are ‘blessed’ with an enormous baby you can always take them back if they’ve not been washed yet.

2. Okay – washing. Do newborn baby clothes need to be pre-washed?

Yes. Probably. Although it’s down to personal preference. You won’t have the newborn baby clothes police knocking on the door if you don’t wash them first. (They’ve got better things to do. Like arrest my boyfriend who bought our son a tie dye ‘I drink until I pass out’ bodysuit from Las Vegas).

Like so many, he lost his head in Vegas.

The facts are these. Babies have very sensitive skin that is very easily irritated. Clothes can harbour dust particles, bacteria and chemicals used to keep them looking fresh and new. They will often have had a long journey before reaching your home. It’s possible that the factories, warehouses, shipping containers and shops won’t have been the cleanest of environments. Second-hand clothes may have been stored for a while and have mildew on them. So it’s probably best to wash them first.

How do I wash newborn clothes?

When washing newborn clothes, you can use either a bio or non-bio laundry detergent. Until very recently, I didn’t really know the difference between bio and non-bio. (Does anybody really know the difference?) But I’ve now discovered that the bio one is a bit stronger because of some enzymes and will be more effective at removing stains. The NHS used to advise that only non-bio was used with babies but recent studies have shown that bio detergents are no more likely to irritate the skin and they now say either is fine.

If you have concerns or your baby has especially sensitive skin, you can also get special baby laundry detergents, which are formulated to be extra gentle.

What temperature should newborn clothes be washed at?

Check the label first but most newborn baby clothes can be washed at 30° or 40°. A higher temperature may cause shrinkage and a good detergent should kill any bugs.

3. Baby outfits are nice but Babygros are easier

Twin babies in matching bow tie and braces outfits.

There are so many irresistible, teeny tiny, cute baby clothes. But for the first few months, life’s easier if they just wear Babygros (also called babygrows, sleepsuits and all-in-ones). Life is uncomfortable enough when you’re a baby – let them be in a onesie all day like we all want to be. When you’re changing nappies and sick-covered clothes, you don’t want to be fiddling around with trousers, tights, shirts, waistcoats, braces, shoes etc. You just want to be able to rip off that babygrow like you’re the Incredible Hulk or a Chippendale.

4. However… you will end up hating poppers

Poppers are amazing for removing baby clothes quickly and getting to a dirty nappy easily. But there will come a stage when you will hate them. This stage will very possibly occur in the middle of the night when you’ve missed a popper for the hundredth time and need to start over again. Sleepsuits that have one different coloured popper can help. (Although not so much help in the dark.) Marks & Spencer Babygros often have one copper-coloured pair. You match it up, making messing up a bit harder. They need to invent sleepsuits with one glow-in-the-dark popper next.

For some wise parents, poppers are just something found at a 90s rave or in the gay community. They instead opt for zipped sleepsuits, which can make life a lot easier.

5. Baby socks NEVER stay on baby feet

Baby socks never stay on. Even if you superglued them on (not advisable) one would STILL stray. I was once in the supermarket with my baby son in a sling. At some point, I looked down and saw that he’d kicked both socks off. I was about to retrace my steps when I noticed that the socks had been neatly balled and discreetly placed in my shopping basket. I often think about that lovely stranger.

The nomadic nature of baby socks is another reason why Babygros are so great, as they have enclosed feet. You can also buy Sock Ons (Amazon link) that - as the name alludes to – keep socks on. Because we can’t all have a kindly stranger discreetly following us around.

6. That envelope neck on a bodysuit is there for a reason

This is how I always kept my bodysuits in the drawer.

Bodysuits (also called vests) tend to have envelope necks, which are wide necklines with an overlap at the shoulders. This makes it easier to get the bodysuit over babies’ weirdly large heads. Especially as they tend not to like having one stuck beneath their noses while you pull hard and consider getting some forceps to help.

BUT there is also a second reason for these wide necks. If your baby does the kind of poo that goes all up their back and over their bodysuit (lucky you!) – the neck is so expansive that you can pull it DOWN over their body. This means you don’t risk getting poo over even more of their back or in your baby’s hair.

I didn’t discover this until my son was two and had grown out of bodysuits. The only time I ever think about having a second child is so that I can use this late acquired knowledge.

7. Everybody wants to give you their outgrown baby clothes

There are huge benefits to this as it can save you a lot of money. But there is a price to pay. Which is - you have to take them all. Even when you don’t want some of it. It’s very hard to pick and choose when these are their precious baby’s first worn items. They may have had a little cry beforehand about parting with a much treasured little jumper. I would find it impossible to turn any away. Even though this has meant having to later filter out all the stained ones. And then try and offload those to someone else.

8. Newborn baby clothes are pretty much all from the same colour palette.

The vast majority of newborn baby clothes are white or pastel coloured. You might get some bright colours but if you want a black Babygro, it’s going to be hard to find. I don’t really understand why they are not all black. Black is much less likely to show up stains. Maybe that’s the point and I’m a disgusting person. I also don’t understand why all clothes, not just baby ones, are not reversible. Our wardrobes could all be 50% smaller. The big wardrobe industry must be finding ways to stunt the reversible clothes market. That’s the only reason I can think of.

9. You will end up with at least one novelty baby clothes item

Whether you buy it yourself or whether it’s a gift, it can be hard to resist the seasonal event babygrow. Easter, Halloween, Eid, Hanukkah and Christmas are good opportunities to dress your baby up and make them look cute or just really, really funny. I do draw the line at Valentine’s Day though. I once saw a baby dressed up in a Valentine’s Day-themed costume and that felt a bit wrong.

There are also everyday novelty or funny clothes like the ‘Daddy baby grow’. The ones that say stuff like, ‘I love my daddy’ or ‘I drink all the milk because my daddy drank all the beer’. I don’t know if that one exists, I just made it up. It probably does though.

10. What newborn baby clothes do I need to buy?

For a list of everything you might need to clothe your newborn baby, in order of popularity, click here. This list was created after extensive research and input from a large panel of new parents. As you can see, the Babygro comes out top. But how many do you need to buy of these and all the other items?

After reviewing all the advice online, I found that these are the most recommended amounts for each item:

Babygros: 6-8
Bodysuits: 6-8
Hats: 2
Pramsuit or coat: 1
Cardigans: 2
Daytime outfits: 5
Socks: anything from 2-10 pairs (or if they fall off as much as mine did - 100 pairs)